inspired to post

I am imspired to write a little tonight as I just tore through a friends persoanl blog as if on a mission - but no seriously was a nice gental read with modest comedy at lifes situational humors.

i spent today thinking about how difficult this journy i am undertaking is going to be 4 me. the diet, or how i keep wanting to refer to it the "current diet" just is nagging at me. it's like I know in my heart that I should NEVER eat that way again. I dont have a choice but to lose as much weight as possible be4 the surg. as this will help reduce the risks of complications for me during the surg.

still every day is getting a little harder as if to say the innitial shields of fat supplies are running low and the bodies about to stage it's war w/ me to remain as heavy as possible. the urges to binge eat are with me. having read a ton of info (women food god) i have to trully realize that this is all inmy head. "head hunger" this word has helped me a lot in the last 2 weeks now/. it's new to my vocab. but i oftenthink of itand how iuse to give in to that urge to eat while almost still chewing upon my previous meal. yes I am being litteral.

to take my mind off food i played 2 tournaments. But not my usual, i won the tournament tonight. i picked up budugi inthe last month. fun game. played a tourny i knew nothing about- did not even realize it was PL rather then FL until the 2nd level. well just knowing the basics and good poker positional skills got me to the Final table and on to the win with ahuge 4 to one chip lead over the field. Easy peazy.

getting delt the 1245 PF was Big about the mid stages getting AI PF vs 2 others standing Pat . i had them crushed of course. but still luck is always a part.